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Tuesday, February 10, 2015

friendship

It feels like ever since I found out I was pregnant- some friendships grew stronger & others slowly weakened. I tried my best to stay positive & attempt to keep putting my best effort towards those friendships but the closer I got to welcoming Hudson into the world, the less I cared to put my energy into friendships that were one sided. It's exhausting! During pregnancy, you are already going through so much & gaining a beautiful relationship with the baby growing in your belly. That connection becomes the most important & other relationships become so small compared to it. 

Now that he's here, he is my very best friend. It's hard to imagine even a minute without him. I spend my days reading to him, teaching him, bringing him on adventures, cuddling with him, nursing, & embracing every single moment I can. Don't get me wrong, it's not always perfect & some days, I just need a break. But when I get those breaks, I want to confide in friends who want to be apart of my life & listen to me vent occasionally. It doesn't happen very often - cause I don't share many personal problems with people. I always strive to have balance in my life, on top of trying to make myself a better person/wife/mother every day. Some days are waaaay better than others! I think having such a positive state of mind can be annoying to people who are negative. So maybe that's why some of those friendships fade away. Who knows - maybe it's just part of growing up. All I know is, I want friends who love me & my family - through & through. Not just fair weather friends.

I only have a select few who are my forever friends, the ones I know I'll be sharing all my motherhood years with -  ones I can call crying, ones who ask me about how my baby is doing, ones who will always, always be there. I'm blessed to have the amazing, genuine friends I do have. These days, women seem to compete about everything- especially when it comes to motherhood. I just don't understand it though. Every person is different- so why wouldn't every woman mother differently. There isn't just one way. I have gotten advice from so many different women. I take bits n pieces & use their knowledge daily. I wouldn't have it any other way. I just hope to be only surrounded by the best, even if it's only a few. I also hope that I can always strive to be a better friend, listen more, & help as much as I possibly can.